In my most recent coaching session, my coach asked about my posture going into the holidays (I mean, we are here, my friends!).
I spent some time talking about what I am looking forward to but it quickly turned to a few things that I don't want the holidays to be.
She asked me, “Mandy, what would you like for the holiday season to look like?”. I ruminated there for a bit.
I almost couldn't vocalize that. I had just given so much energy to what I DIDN'T want that I hadn't given any energy to defining what I did want to create for my family during the upcoming holiday season.
That mindset left no action to take but to sit and focus on the negative. It felt like I had no control over my experience….um, no thank you. I want to be an action taker….
While being so hyperfocused on what I didn't want during the holiday, no good energy was spent on creating what I do want.
What do I want my energy level to be during the season? (This question was prompted by the graphic that I posted at the top of this email.)
How do I want my family to experience the traditions that we love so much?
Knowing what is important to us, how can I make those times as special as they can be?
Once I started to shift my focus, all kinds of good energy came along with the feelings and activities that I know I want to create. In no time, I was able to talk about how I want our holiday season to be special for us.
It was transformative.
I immediately was able to think of several traditions important to me and my favorite people that I need to get on the calendar.
Also, I was reminded that the holiday season encompasses several weeks worth of time, and no one specific event. It's all the experiences together that make up our holiday experience.
I immediately had clarity of mind, which allowed me to focus on some tasks that would make scheduling easier - actions that I could take.
I began to ask myself, “What am I doing to create that holiday experience?”. Total mindset shift…..
Can you relate? What is your posture going into the holidays?
Do you wish something were different during the holidays?
Would you like the focus of some event or time to be different?
Do you want more __________ in the holidays?
Let's ask different questions instead - questions that allow for us to move toward something we want.
What can I schedule into the holiday season that can contribute to a season that I want to create?
How can I show up for time with others that would be in alignment with what's important to me?
How can I create the experience (and others to experience around me) this holiday season?
What could your holiday look like if you brought the energy that you want to it?
Note: This thinking requires no action or changing of anyone else around you. It's all you. And just like I tell my boys, you control you.
Let's choose how we show up.
I'm not going to sit any longer and hyperfocus on what I don't want but instead go create what's important to me during my holiday season.
I may need this reminder next year too. That's ok.
Let's take action to create the holiday experience.
You can too, friend.
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